You ever try and try to please those around you,and always feel like a failure? You give it your best,and always seem to fall short. So what do we do? I can continually let my feelings be hurt,hold it all in,and just keep trying. Or I can just start avoiding those who seem to love feeling superior at my expense. I am too old to be playing games,and yet,each day is a new game.I am tired. I want to stand and scream,”what about me? Do I ever matter to anyone?” I left one horrific,abusive environment to find peace,and while finding peace,I also found that the things that seemed to be just what I wanted,needed,isn’t true. So what to do?
I have found peace,great peace with the Lord. He hasn’t removed me from the situations that break my heart,but He has truly given me the grace to endure it. I have been meditating on the Scripture that says,”Do not let your heart be troubled,neither let it be afraid.” It may sounds easy,but it is a battle each day. With each new thought,each new fear,I say this out loud,and it does indeed calm my heart. I cannot afford to get into fear,or let the troubles that come in storms,bother me. His grace is more than sufficient,and I am depending on Him for an abundance of grace. Peace that is sweet to my soul floods me as I meditate on what He says,and not to what others say. Now,don’t get me wrong,I put on my “listening ears”,but I don’t take it in,deep inside me. I am guarding my heart,for out of it certainly flows the issues of life.